he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
The beer is more important than you right now.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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