The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
then he tried to convert me to islam
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
