my phone needs a breathalizer
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize