We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
