He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
