A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
