bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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