who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
