i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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