His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
