I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize
