did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
