I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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