I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
