I need help removing her.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
