Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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