We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
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