We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
