why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
