I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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