Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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