is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
