Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
