you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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