So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
