He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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