And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize
