they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
