You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
