Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
