we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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