It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
