Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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