My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I want her autograph on my taint
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
