brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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