did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I have grass duct taped all over my body
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
