No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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