On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
