Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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