Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize