i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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