Ambien. No doubt about it.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
