She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
