you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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