i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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