he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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