clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Randomize
