Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
