Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
