Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
